scarlet tinted suburbia ... open 24 hours

In the paper today there is an entire section on Cherry Hill. ENTIRE SECTION. I picked up the paper and thought, "What writer ACTUALLY thinks Cherry Hill is special?" and then I noted the name of the writer, and it happened to be the mom of someone I went to school with from 3rd through 8th grade. I forgot that their mom was a writer, and it occured to me that the writer was from Cherry Hill and thats why they wrote it. But obviously some whackjob editor had to approve of the printing of said SECTION, so I figured there must be something to be said for it.
So I read through the article. Looked at the pictures for people that I knew. I recognized a couple people. And when I was done, I was left was this incredible, I don't know, loneliness. I felt disconnected from everything I grew up with, and right now I'm finding a hard time reasoning with why exactly I wanted to move. Cherry Hill is most certainly not perfect, and it isn't as nice as Medford. But it definitely has something I don't have any more: familiarity. I've noticed more and more just how important it is to know people that you grew up with. How much easier it is to feel like you know someone, how much I miss the way things used to be. I wanted to move because I wanted a change, but now I know that I could have made changes while staying right there in Cherry Hill.
I have always felt different here in Medford. While some people are great and awesome, I just never feel like most people like me by myself. It's weird, feeling like I put on an act all the time. It's like stepping out of yourself for a day and observing how you act, and realizing you don't know who you are. I know this sounds strange, but that's how I feel a lot.
I know if I had gone to high school in Cherry Hill it would not be what I picture in my head, because all my friends go to different schools. Nonetheless, I miss feeling at home. Like I belong somewhere.
I don't know what I'm saying and I don't feel like saying it any more. I could elaborate more but it's just all over the place. And I'm making myself depressed.

Song to download: Dexter Freebish - Leaving Town